Day 5! 1st Day with Surgical Oncologist!

Day 5

TGIF
Surgeon day.
Couldn't sleep last night until I cried for awhile and past out on the couch!
Woke up early like a 1st grader on her 1st day of school.
"Is it 11:30 yet?" was all I could think!
Drive to the Doc was good.
Excited.
Stole my moms convertible.
Top down.
Sun shining.
Goin to get a plan.
Need a damn plan.
Going to get a plan.
Going to get a plan.
"Whoa am I really going 90 mph?"
I know the EOS is fast but my nerves are pressin this pedal to the metal.
Speeding ticket would be awful!
Slow your roll Jessica Carmen!

Memorial Regional Hospital.
My heart sank.
Here we go.
BRING IT!
Up we go, my hand tightly in Anthony's.
3rd floor. DING.
Waiting room.
Other cancer patients.
Another couple.
A 96 year old speaking German with her son and daughter in law.
Her son told us she spoke only English until she was diagnosed with cancer, now they all have to learn German! lol! He said "Can I divorce my mom?"
He made me smile!
Another family with a young little girl around 4 years old.
Mother was wearing a hat and had no hair!
Talk about shock.
I finally felt it!

CANCER!

My heart skipped a beat.
We were there at 10:50.
Appointment was at 11:30.
Filled out paperwork.
Then watched the time tick away and them call everyone but us in.
Every time the door would open I wanted to hurl!
"Are they EVER gonna call my name?"
TV was on in the waiting room.
I heard "They shot the terrorist..." and "Michael Jackson's trial..." about a million times.
Grrrr could they have something positive on the TV?
WTF how depressing.....
I kept thinking.....the next headline is gonna be, "Girl looses it in waiting room and chews off her own arm. Experts are stunned!"

1:00 FINALLY!
"Jessica Hoff"
I jump up from my seat!
Anthony was more anxious then I was I think but had to remind him I need him to be strong.
I know that this is gonna be a crazy journey for us both!

1:30 Doc finally comes in.
This is after flashing Anthony to make him smile! Lol!
Hey...they may be gone soon! Shake um if ya got um! =)
Anyway Doc said, "So sorry!"
"I had to meet with the head of medical oncology, Dr. Perez."
"I wanted to review your case with her and see if she would take you on as a patient and she agreed!"
"She one of the top in the field and has patients flying in from around the world to see her. She is going to clear some time to meet with you!"
Then Dr. Neimark went on to explain....ALOT!
Thought tequila made my head spin...nope cancer wins!
HOLY MOLY!

My CaringBridge goes into detail about the medical aspect of my journey.
www.caringbridge.org/visit/jessicahoff
Or CaringBridge.org then search for jessicahoff
Journal entries will be here.
Specific medical updates will be there.

The short version is this...
Getting 2nd opinion.
New lab results this week.
Need PET scan to check whole body for cancer.
And an MRI.
Treatment probably chemo the surgery and reconstructive surgery, then more chemo or radiation.
Have to have a consult with Radiation and then one with Dr. Perez!
Then see where all of that leads me.

Talk about a mental hurricane!

The rest of the day was a blur.
More phone calls, updates, concerned people.
Can even begin to explain my brain spaghetti just slopping around in my head!
I can't even spell my first name!
So..
Here I go again...
Tylenol PM...
Hopefully sleep.
Nite!