Day 89

Day 89

Friday Dec 23rd

Well this last week has been another of ups and downs.
My bone scan and chest and pelvic CT scan came back negative, free of cancer! Yay!
I do have a kidney stone that I didn't know about but that is fine by me!
I can deal with that!
Saturday Val, one of my best friends, flew in from Minnesota!!!!!
It's sooo good to be surrounded by friends and family!
I feel sooo blessed!
They take the time, money and effort to come be by my side and help me!
Val played Auntie very well to the boys!
A Christmas gift EVERY day, lots of playing Spiderman and good-guy-bad-guy, and many games of Chutes and Ladders!
I think she had enough babysitting for awhile! lol!
Saturday and Sunday were pretty good days.
Monday was the dreaded day of switching my chemo to FEC!
No more Taxol!
FEC...aka The Big Guns I like to call it...here I come!
HOLY CANOLI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Val came with me.

It took all day 9-5 to see Doc then premeds then the three different chemos this "chemo cocktail" consists of!
She had to drive me home!
I guess Val and Anthony said I was functioning that night acting really tired but I completely blacked out! I don't remember hardly anything from the whole rest of the night!!! SCARY!
I guess I helped make dinner, was up walking around and talking, but no recollection of this what so ever!
Tues was another rough day!
Nausea, extreme fatigue, could barley get out of bed except to get dinner with the girls because Val was leaving the next day so I forced myself after lots of meds!
Wednesday I went back to the Breast Cancer Center where my Dr is and I get chemo for my shot of Denosumab (research drug) and Neulasta (the drug that helps my white blood count build up because the chemo kills a lot of them!)
As soon as I walk in they take one look at me and say that I look horrible and am gonna need fluids and meds through my IV!
I had not been able to eat or drink much at all and was very weak.
The Big Guns are kickin my ass!
So they plug me in give me more meds and fluids.
Val has to leave and I break down!
I am so sick and my best friend is leaving me!
My heart is breaking!
WHY?!
WHY do I have to deal with this SHIT!?!?!?!?!?!?
I am angry and sick and feeling sorry for myself! A BIG MESS!
The rest of that night I sleep!
Thursday I feel awful! No eating or drinking again.  Meds for nausea don't seem to be working!
Friday I had an appointment at the Center for acupuncture.
I am trying ANYTHING to help me!
I met with Amy the Acupuncture Dr. that works with breast cancer patients specifically.

http://sear-enity.com/Sear-Enity_Natural_Medicine/Welcome.html

So did a through investigation of what I am taking, how I am feeling and then got the Dr. to come in and talk to me! They said I have unusual not normal symptoms they were worried about!
Blacking out like I did Monday, I have been seeing spots and having very blurred vision and not eating or drinking!
Then I got a short acupuncture session then they decide I need more meds and fluids and an emergency Brain MRI!!!
What I may have cancer in my brain!?!?!?
FREAK OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I thought i had checked my entire body but I guess not my brain!
So after fluids and more meds, including Aloxi a strong anti-nasuea med that supposedly lasts 7 days, and acupuncture I head to a different hospital where they could squeeze me in that afternoon for the MRI!
LONG DAY! And I had to go by myself!
I am NEVER going by myself again!
I was so stressed and had no one to talk to or calm me down!
Note to self......hire a side kick! lol!
Finally got home around 6 after picking up yet another prescription.
This one was $60 for 8 pills!
That is all my insurance would cover!
I am suppose to take 1 every 12 hours!
And I got 8! Really?!?!? Thanks insurance company for working with me to help me feel better!
(NOTE MY SARCASM!)
If I wanted to fill the whole 30 day prescription the pharmacist said is was going to be $1200...not $120...$1200 mother trucking dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ridiculous!
But at least I have some to get me through this next holiday weekend!
It will help me have a merrier Christmas! I hope!!!!

Someone...I can't say who, shut the door at the Center and said..."Many patients have success with smoking marjuiana, I think you should try it...but you didn't hear it from me!"
I love my hospital! =)
So guess what I am gonna try....you guessed it! It's legal in many states for this reason so damn it if I am not gonna do something that can help me!


I got the results of the brain scan this evening and no cancer in my brain either!
Thank you God!
Prayers are being answered! Keep um coming!


My little bro comes tomorrow!
It's gonna be a great weekend!
Hoping for a better week next week!
Next chemo is not until Jan. 11th!
If its one bad week two good, I will be a happy camper!

Have a great holiday everyone!
xoxoxo
God bless!